Appalling encounters with Christianity:
Over the past 21 years, I have lived with this idea: Christianity.Conformed to every thought, belief, practice and custom of this religion. Through stages of my growth, I have always learned to question things that I never understood. Deep within me, rationalism was the answer to those "koans"( Why are you asking me? GOOGLE IT!). I questioned christian god, whether Jesus was god himself, why it is difficult to experience a physical god and why is such a privilege recommended only for "the highly religious?", when religion and god are said to be for the"common man". Whats the difference between spirituality and religion? Why is the world running amok even when young are bred in sunday schools and the old attend church every sunday? Why is the society promoting an unethical competitive spirit? Where has all the compassion and respect for fellow humans gone? Why are people frustrated with their marriages, work life, people around them?
I stood alone facing all these questions, as I stood years ago with the simpler versions of the same.
My experiences with this religion have never been emboldening. Am I the only one being the outcast? Bible may be the oldest book written, but personally, why isn't it teaching me the newest thoughts that promote the validity of questions like "What the hell am I doing here"?
I am not an atheist. I do believe that there is a higher consciousness that exists above human realms of rationalism. My search is refined. My mind quests to know why religious practices of this religion doesn't touch upon our intellect? Why isn't Jesus's teachings not interpreted in a way that encourages us to look into ourselves for the solutions to our problems? He never said, I am god, depend on me. He said, there is a higher power out there, ask him, and you'l get. Believe, you'l achieve. Instead, we misinterpret it as, " Jesus is god, praise him, worship him, surrender yourself to him, don't question him, and he'l relieve you of your problems!". We teach dependance. And dependence is viral. Its genetic; It passes on. Until, we finally discern that our problems are not being solved by any religion. At this juncture, some give up, either conforming themselves to living a life that is pointless and valueless. Some move on to better thoughts. Some take to violence to assert wrong interpretation. Some become atheists. Some clueless and uncaring about spirituality at all dimensions.
To me, Buddhist outlook on life has always been meaningful. Their ways of mindful living, and meditative outlook on things, resounds, of being highly conducive to intellectual pursuits and "looking inside for understanding" practices. The focal point of Buddha's teaching: Life is a struggle and the solutions to all our problems are within each one of us,stop being dependant, control your mind, be minimalistic, etc are in direct contrast to civilized interpretations on Jesus's teachings ( NOTE: I still regard his teachings to be actually encompassing all these points, considering, historically, Jesus is thought of being a Buddhist himself, leading a monk life from age 12 to 30)
I am still searching. I have had the liberty to discuss these doubts of mine with a devout catholic: My dad. He promptly suggested these erratic questioning patterns to be derivatives of lack of proper catholic principles and teaching from my sunday school timeline. He also exacerbated with words, his displeasure at my attitude, which according to him is atheistic and warned me of possible harsh repercussions in terms of life experiences.
I will keep looking, because when my kids grow up to repeat the process, I'l have to answer them. I'l have to lead them. Not many will have the capability to search for the truth and persist till they find it. You don't need to be a monk or live out your life in the himalayas to do that. Observations arise from daily life. Its the interpretations that make all the difference.
Request: If you are reading this and like to share a point of view( contradictory or conforming), Please do so, because "liking" it on FB or "suggesting" it on google will help neither you, nor me...
Over the past 21 years, I have lived with this idea: Christianity.Conformed to every thought, belief, practice and custom of this religion. Through stages of my growth, I have always learned to question things that I never understood. Deep within me, rationalism was the answer to those "koans"( Why are you asking me? GOOGLE IT!). I questioned christian god, whether Jesus was god himself, why it is difficult to experience a physical god and why is such a privilege recommended only for "the highly religious?", when religion and god are said to be for the"common man". Whats the difference between spirituality and religion? Why is the world running amok even when young are bred in sunday schools and the old attend church every sunday? Why is the society promoting an unethical competitive spirit? Where has all the compassion and respect for fellow humans gone? Why are people frustrated with their marriages, work life, people around them?
I stood alone facing all these questions, as I stood years ago with the simpler versions of the same.
My experiences with this religion have never been emboldening. Am I the only one being the outcast? Bible may be the oldest book written, but personally, why isn't it teaching me the newest thoughts that promote the validity of questions like "What the hell am I doing here"?
I am not an atheist. I do believe that there is a higher consciousness that exists above human realms of rationalism. My search is refined. My mind quests to know why religious practices of this religion doesn't touch upon our intellect? Why isn't Jesus's teachings not interpreted in a way that encourages us to look into ourselves for the solutions to our problems? He never said, I am god, depend on me. He said, there is a higher power out there, ask him, and you'l get. Believe, you'l achieve. Instead, we misinterpret it as, " Jesus is god, praise him, worship him, surrender yourself to him, don't question him, and he'l relieve you of your problems!". We teach dependance. And dependence is viral. Its genetic; It passes on. Until, we finally discern that our problems are not being solved by any religion. At this juncture, some give up, either conforming themselves to living a life that is pointless and valueless. Some move on to better thoughts. Some take to violence to assert wrong interpretation. Some become atheists. Some clueless and uncaring about spirituality at all dimensions.
To me, Buddhist outlook on life has always been meaningful. Their ways of mindful living, and meditative outlook on things, resounds, of being highly conducive to intellectual pursuits and "looking inside for understanding" practices. The focal point of Buddha's teaching: Life is a struggle and the solutions to all our problems are within each one of us,stop being dependant, control your mind, be minimalistic, etc are in direct contrast to civilized interpretations on Jesus's teachings ( NOTE: I still regard his teachings to be actually encompassing all these points, considering, historically, Jesus is thought of being a Buddhist himself, leading a monk life from age 12 to 30)
I am still searching. I have had the liberty to discuss these doubts of mine with a devout catholic: My dad. He promptly suggested these erratic questioning patterns to be derivatives of lack of proper catholic principles and teaching from my sunday school timeline. He also exacerbated with words, his displeasure at my attitude, which according to him is atheistic and warned me of possible harsh repercussions in terms of life experiences.
I will keep looking, because when my kids grow up to repeat the process, I'l have to answer them. I'l have to lead them. Not many will have the capability to search for the truth and persist till they find it. You don't need to be a monk or live out your life in the himalayas to do that. Observations arise from daily life. Its the interpretations that make all the difference.
Request: If you are reading this and like to share a point of view( contradictory or conforming), Please do so, because "liking" it on FB or "suggesting" it on google will help neither you, nor me...
